This is Part 4 of my series of articles on anxiety.
In the previous article, (Anxiety, Part 3), we talked about three components of anxiety: Thoughts, Physical Sensations, and Behaviours.
We also learned that each component affects the other two.
In this section, we'll see how we can deal with each of those components.
1. Overcoming Anxious Thinking
The first step is to actually start being aware of your thinking. Some people find it easy to do, while others initially struggle to identify their thoughts.
Start paying attention to the thoughts that cross your mind in situations when you are anxious. Whenever possible, record those thoughts.
Sometimes it's easier to start from situations where you are only mildly anxious and gradually work up to identifying the thoughts in more anxiety-producing situations.
After you have a good understanding of the anxious thoughts that you experience repeatedly, try to examine how true they are.
Ask yourself with regard to your anxious thought:
- What is the evidence that this thought is true?
- What is the evidence that this thought is not true?
- Has it happened before? How often?
- What is the likelihood of it happening in the future?
- Is it a guess or a fact?
- Is it a hassle or a horror?
- What is the worst outcome?
- The best outcome?
- The most likely outcome?
- What would my non-anxious friend say about it?
Try to separate the evidence and the reality from the way you feel. Sometimes we make a thinking error believing that if we have a bad feeling, it means that things will be bad.
It may be useful to have a friend help you evaluate the evidence for and against your thought.
After the thorough evaluation of the thought, write down an alternative realistic statement that better reflects the reality. This statement does not have to be positive. It just has to be based on facts.
2. Addressing Anxiety-Induced Physical Sensations
Two techniques that best address the physical sensations are:
- Progressive Muscle Tension and Relaxation
- Abdominal Breathing
It is important to practice those techniques at times that you are not anxious, - at least in the beginning.
Schedule about 15 minutes a couple of times a day to do those exercises, for example in the morning and before bed.
Progressive Muscle Tension and Relaxation
This is a special way of tensing and relaxing your muscles.
Why can't we just relax the muscles? Why is it necessary to tense them first?
Sometimes, if we try to relax the muscles without tensing them first, it is difficult to achieve real relaxation. When stressed, we tend to forget how relaxed muscles feel! Therefore, start from one group of muscles and tense it for about five seconds. Then release and relax for about fifteen seconds.
- For example, start with your right hand. Make a fist and hold for five seconds. Release for fifteen seconds.
- Now tense the entire right arm for 5 seconds. Release for fifteen seconds.
- Then repeat on the left side.
- The same with foot, lower leg, upper leg, and then entire leg.
- Repeat on the other side.
- Then tense and relax buttocks, stomach, chest, shoulders, neck, mouth, eyes, and face.
Some important tips:
- In the beginning, practice only in a non-anxious state
- Each time you release the muscles and relax, concentrate on the difference between the tense state and the relaxed state. This is very important and will eventually help you quickly achieve the relaxed state, as you will know the exact feeling of it.
- Another benefit of that is that you'll start to notice the first signs of tension as you go about your day, which will allow you to address it early on.
- As you progress, you can tense and relax both arms, then both legs, then the torso, and then the face.
- As you progress even further, you will be able to just relax without tensing the muscle first. But don't rush there. It will take a lot of practice first.
To practice Abdominal Breathing, lie down on your back and put one hand on the abdomen and another on your chest. Try to breathe in the way that the air travels all the way down toward your tummy. Your goal is for the hand on your abdomen to move up and down, and the hand on your chest remain still.
Now try to inhale to a count of four, then hold your breath for about two counts, and then exhale to a count of four. Then pause for another count of two.
As you practice, you can work toward making your exhalation longer than inhalation:
- Inhale for a count of four
- Hold your breath for a count of two
- Exhale for a count of six
- Pause for a count of two
Please note that the goal of those techniques is not to avoid being anxious!
Remember, anxiety is our friend and we don't want to get rid of it. We also don't want to see it as dangerous and desperately try to avoid feeling anxious.
Instead, those are effective techniques to help you feel calmer during the day (and who doesn't need that!), and also to take the edge off of anxiety in difficult situations so that you can cope with them more effectively.
3. Changing Behaviours
This is a major part of addressing anxiety and it deserves a separate chapter. Please read on to learn about The Discovery of Oz the Terrible.